a circle sister who shares, “My boyfriend wants me to do things
that I’m just not comfortable with. He says if I won’t he can find
someone else who will”. She is comforted because there are other
sisters there…older women who have had similar experiences years ago
and are able to offer their wisdom
They remind her she is valuable.
I find myself surprised because even though the world has
changed so much since I was in my 20s there’s still much that has
stayed the same. In her sharing I’ve found something of value to
pass on to my daughter as she readies herself to move into the world.
I thank this 20 something sister because she has made me a better mother. “How can that be?” she asks, “I’ve never been a mother.”
I say “because I heard you with my heart”.
I see myself turning and listening to the heart of middle age woman…a circle sister who shares what she’s struggling with.
She cries out “Why won’t my body let me be mother?!”
Her sisters hold her and she is reminded of how
often she nurtures her circle sisters and cheer them on.
She is comforted by all her sisters and told that she is valuable.
“How can that be?” she asks, “I’ll never be a mother.”
And we’ll say “because we heard you with our hearts.”
I see myself turning and listening to the heart of another woman
slightly older than middle aged shares her struggles.
“I’ve spent so much time being a mother I lost myself
somewhere along the way and I don’t know how to find her again.”
We comfort her and invite her out and tell her she is valuable still.
In her sharing I’ve found something of value because I realize
I hadn’t done anything for myself in a long while so I decide to
get a babysitter and join them for dessert after the play.
I thank her and reaffirm her value.
“How can I be valuable to you?” she asks, “I’m done being a
full time mother.”
l'll say “because I heard you with our hearts.”
I see myself turning and listening to the heart of a career woman
who shares what she’s struggling with.
“I’ve just buried my parents and I have no family because I am an
only child and I chose not to have children.
Now I’m being asked when I am going to retire.
Have I wasted my life because I haven't had a child? What's left for me?”
Another sister shares how lonely she has been since
her husband died. “My kids are busy with their kids and
don’t have time for me.” And sisters all around them offer comfort and tell
them both how much they value these sister’s experiences.
The widow promises to check in with the parentless sister outside of circle.
We reaffirm their value as we tell them both
“we’ve heard you with our hearts.”
The faces of these women swim before me
young and old women enjoy each other.
As I open my eyes and see a lovely multigenerational
group of women sitting at my table
I hold back the tears of gratitude
Because the reality of what I created
is even better than what I envisioned.